Labyrinth: A Classic Review

Ahhh... Labyrinth. One of the best things to come out of 1986. Other than me, of course.

David Bowie, George Lucas, and Muppets. Three more amazing things have never been combined.

Sarah (played by a young Jennifer Connelly) is obsessed with a fantasy world that involves goblins and the notoriously creepy Goblin King, Jareth.

In a fit of frustration with her crying baby brother, Sarah summons the goblins to take him away by making up some magical poem/chant. Oh, she's so silly.

But wait! Somehow she said the right chant, and cue the bizzaro singing goblin muppets! Hooray!

Sarah must make a deal with David Bowie, aka Jareth, aka Crazy Eyebrows (as I like to call him), the androgynously seductive Goblin King. She must make it through his ridiculous Labyrinth to get to the castle to save her baby brother from being turned into a goblin.

Forget the plot... it's almost irrelevant. This whole movie is a tasty treat for the eyes, with 80s style musical numbers, puppets that almost give you nightmares due to their weirdness, and great scenery (including some really crazy wacked-out stairs).


We can't forget Bowie balancing a crystal ball in his hands. I was devastated to learn they weren't actually his hands. Damn you, 80s special effects. You got me... you got me good.



We can't talk about Labyrinth without giving you a taste of a musical number either... or some muppets for that matter!

P.S. - If you're gonna watch the movie, be sure to check out the ridiculous bulge in Bowie's pants. It's obscene. Almost unfit for a kid's movie.

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